Do you ever ask yourself, what even is alcohol moderation?! Does that not seem like a subjective idea that is different for every individual?
Your phone is buzzing with friends anxiously waiting for you. And the moment you grab a hold of your front door, it springs in your mind: Should I not drink that much tonight? Or should I? Does it even matter?
The internal battle is real, and it lasts about 30 seconds before you completely forget about it and turn the "lightbulb-moment" off in your mind.
Well, in the morning when your eyes peel open (with great difficulty) you will groan to yourself, yes... It does matter!
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So, what is it? What is alcohol moderation and how can we avoid the backlash of waking up, yet again, in frustration that we over did it?
As someone who has lived through her early 20s, drinking wayyy too much (even making my own fermented alcoholic drinks), and then working in Napa Valley wine country... I learned that alcohol moderation really is individualized.
It depends on how you are showing up, what you are going through, what are your goals (in life and for the week), what is your background, etc.
So, it all comes down to one tiny shift that anyone and everyone can benefit from to conquer alcohol moderation. This tiny shift can meet anyone where they are, at any age, etc. The secret to alcohol moderation...
This post is all about alcohol moderation!
Alcohol Moderation
Why traditional moderation fails
Traditional alcohol moderation fails because for each person it is different! Think about going out every weekend and having 8 drinks each night you go out. Alcohol moderation to that person might be going out but only have 4 drinks each night...
Then, for someone who does not go out really at all, alcohol moderation might be sharing a bottle of wine with their husband once a month. So, moderation of alcohol depends on the circumstances!
No one answer for someone will be the same for someone else. Hence, why "moderation" ideas tend to fail. It is not a one size fits all kind of situation.
Though, you could argue that we can all just follow the guidelines from the government (1-3 drinks a day), but for someone like myself who doesn't drink that much that is still a lot!
So, how can we actually have alcohol moderation?!
The tiny shift you need to know about
The tiny shift that you need to know about that can impact your entire drinking session... And that works for everyone!
Tiny Shift: Focus on how you feel before you drink (and how you want to feel after) instead of how much you drink.
Too often we are concerned with how much to drink. Is it 3 drinks? Or 2 drinks? It changes depending on if you're a man or woman or how much you weigh, etc, etc.
How about we just focus on how we feel and how we want to feel?
At that point, we can shift our perspectives based on what is happening, how we want to feel, what we are going through, etc. It is almost like a holistic approach to drinking.
Many times when someone drinks it can be a modality of "self-medicating". Which I have been there, and will probably be there again sometime, but once we bring the awareness in we can make better decisions in terms of alcohol moderation.
So, ask yourself:
- How do you feel now?
- Are you craving alcohol because you are upset (sad, angry, etc)?
- Or do you just want to have fun?
- How do you want to feel in the morning?
- Do you have something to look forward to in the morning to be alert for?
These are the questions we must be asking ourselves when we want alcohol moderation.
So, if you find yourself noticing that you are upset (and that is why you want to drink) then be very cautious of your drinking.
In any case, be cautious. Drinking can be dangerous and we need to understand how we feel before we drink so we can make better decision before we are under the influence.
So, what does that even look like?! That looks like taking preemptive steps before you go drinking to make a "self assessment". An assessment that will help you know where you are at and where you want to be...
I have made a simple (and intentional) going-out checklist and drink plan, so you can find your moderation while staying true to yourself. I do this when I go out (usually just in my mind), but I decided to turn it into a free printable!
FREE going-out checklist and intentional drink plan
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After going through this checklist and drink plan, you will know where you are and where you want to be. You will go out and come home knowing exactly what alcohol moderation looks and FEELS like for you.
Real-life examples
At this point, you might be wondering how this looks and how you can apply it to your life. So, here are some real life examples of how to utilize this one tiny shift to conquer alcohol moderation.
Example: Happy hour
Don't we all love a happy hour? So, sometimes when I plan a happy hour a few days in advance when it gets to the day to go out I find myself wildly tired.
I did not anticipate the week to be super busy, to not sleep well, whatever it is. So, when I am going out and realize that I am tired instead of reaching for a drink while I get ready to boost me up... I reach for hydration like water, electrolytes, lemon water, etc.
Even that tiny shift in the beginning of the evening of, "I am tired so I will drink lots of water and have a drink or two out, then come home."
INSTEAD OF, "I am tired so I will have a couple drinks before going out then just keep drinking until I want to stop". Because let's be real, if you drink until you want to stop you might not find that stop button.
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Example: Pouring a glass of wine at home
Over the past summer, I realized something... When I have a bottle of wine I love to drink it! It just sits there and calls my name. So, even when I am not really craving a glass, I would pour one anyway. What is that?
I pour a glass and realize, oh wow, I have had a drink every night this entire week!! How did that happen??!
The answer is: lack of awareness and boredom.
Afterwards I decided to notice how I was feeling before drinking and really ask myself, "Ali, why are you doing this?" Turns out, a lot of it was boredom and a lot of it was habit. I was starting to form a habit!
So, the tiny shift of just noticing how I was feeling before drinking allowed me to take a pause and turn my attention towards something more aligned (family time, yoga, a walk, etc).
I hope those two example make sense, and no matter where you are with drinking, whether it's really for social settings or an at-home habit. This tiny shift can help you wherever you are!